When life threatened to drown me, I went stress-diving for answers. This book threw me a fcking lifeline.
I found this book the way you find most life-changing things:
Panic-Googling at the edge of a breakdown.
It was the summer of 2016.
I was deep into EMDR therapy for cPTSD, signed off work “for healing,”
except… minor detail:
I was self-employed.
And the only thing scarier than trauma was unpaid bills.
So there I was, smashing “talks about stress” into the TED search bar like my life depended on it.
That’s where I found Kelly McGonigal’s TED Talk—and it cracked something open.
The idea that thinking stress is bad is actually worse than the stress itself?
Mind. Blown.
It wasn’t just a fact. It was a f*cking lifeline.
Naturally, I bought The Upside of Stress immediately.
Watch the TED Talk on You Tube:
🖤 The Verdict?
This isn’t a “manifest your way out of reality” book.
It’s packed with real, actionable insights about:
- Harnessing your stress response instead of fearing it
- Recovering from stress with resilience, not shutdown
- Using care for others as a literal chemical advantage
- Reframing the whole damn experience of being alive and overwhelmed
“How you think and how you act can transform your experience of stress.”
Yeah. That line got under my skin in the best possible way.
🖤 Why It Matters:
This book didn’t shame me for being overloaded.
It gave me tools to stay standing when everything else wanted me to collapse.
It’s light enough to read even on the darkest days.
And trust me—when the world’s closing in, sometimes hope is a heavier tool than rage.
This is one I’ve returned to over and over again.
It’s not just a book. It’s a battle map.
🖤 Spoon & Fire Rating:
🥄🥄 (Manageable, even mid-meltdown)
🔥🔥🔥🔥 (Uplifting, practical, stubbornly optimistic)
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Buy from Amazon: https://amzn.to/3EQ9pHM
The Weigh Back Spoon & Fire System
- 🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄 — Absolutely draining. Blanket fort mandatory. May trigger emotional hibernation.
- 🥄🥄🥄🥄 — Still heavy. Requires tea, tissues, and possibly rage cleaning.
- 🥄🥄🥄 — Some emotional tax. Manageable with snacks and pacing.
- 🥄🥄 — Low impact. You might even read it in one sitting.
- 🥄 — Minimal spoon loss. Surprisingly gentle.
👉 Fewer spoons = more accessible. More spoons = emotionally expensive.
🔥 Fire Scale for Value:
- 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 — Life-changing. Worth every tear, flashback, and swearing fit.
- 🔥🔥🔥🔥 — Really bloody helpful.
- 🔥🔥🔥 — Decent. Useful with caveats.
- 🔥🔥 — Bit meh.
- 🔥 — Therapy might be cheaper.
